Just out of reach

our cat, tinner, is used to stella just laying like a blob on the floor.

i started the 30 Day Shred last night.

when i ordered it earlier this week, matt said he would like to do it with me. instead, he sat on the couch and interjected every few minutes with things i was doing wrong.

he will not be watching me ever again. or even be in the house.

but i actually felt pretty good afterwards, and coincidentally did not even want the mini buffalo burgers i had boxed up from ruby tuesdays as a reward for my hard work.

watch out

stella got up on all fours today. twice. oh no, i'm not ready for this!

life is good.

i haven't written much since the big/quick move. i don't have as much free time as i used to. okay i take that back. i don't have as much "bored" time as i used to. what a difference it makes to be around civilization again. what a difference it makes to be around family. i love it. i think we needed the eight months of quiet life up north, however. i really think it not only allowed, but pushed us to establish our own family. to work as a team and as a unit. to adjust to going from "newly married couple" to "family of three".

matt and i were only married five months when i discovered i was pregnant. we were only married a total of 14 months when stella was born. we still had a lot to learn about each other and ourselves. the timing was perfect. and we are doing good. really good. i've learned i'm not always good at communicating (even though i graduated with a degree in it, tricky!) and that marriage takes effort especially during transitions. i wouldn't say i love matt more but i do think it is a deeper love. a treasure.

so with that, our little stella is doing great. she's been eating cereal and avocados. she's on the verge of crawling (!). sleeping pretty well. loving long walks and being outside. loving meeting new people (although she is starting to get a little separation anxiety). she's my little buddy. matt is back at the office and enjoying being back on a routine. he's been so used to getting up early now, that he lets me sleep in on the weekends! he's had the opportunity to spend a lot more time golfing and will have the occasional cigar. as for me, i'm pretty content and fulfilled observing loving moments in my family.

life is good. God is good.

i see you

half a year later

my little baby girl turned six months old today. so many people say "where has the time gone?" and while i'm not saying time has not gone by quickly, i think i know the answer to that question.

i have truly enjoyed every moment i have spent with little stella. sometimes the time goes by quickly, sometimes slowly (those times where she did not want to sleep a wink). but as i watch her learn and grow and change and as her personality shines through i realize how much i've enjoyed the changes being made.

of course i miss my little newborn that could curl up in my one arm and wanted to snuggle all day long, but i also love my half-year old baby girl that giggles and smiles and raises her eyebrows and looks at me like she understands what i'm saying. i love my little buddy that goes with me everywhere and experiences new things with me. i love talking to her. i love listening to her. i love who she is becoming.

i've always heard talk about how much you will love your child, but i could never fathom what that meant. now i know it is indescribable. every day my heart breaks with love for her. there is really know way i can explain or even fathom how much love i have for her. my baby. who loves to smile. loves her daddy. loves to be out and about. loves to taste the wind with her tongue. and i think she loves me too =).

so happy six months, sweet girl.

we are so proud of you. we are so captivated and in love with you. so utterly enthralled with you. and to think that our Father looks on us with love even greater than this is beyond me.

so this is what all the fuss is about...

stella's first solids

"you guys have something up your sleeves, i can tell."

"hold my hand, this is scary."

"hmmm... it's actually kind of good"

"it's actually really good"

"can i try and do it myself, dad?"

"i LOVE it!"

"keep it coming""okay, now this is getting old."
"please, no more!"