Good morning world.

This weekend has left me refreshed with a renewed ability to find joy in the small things. The trees are bare and the grass is brown. The air smells like winter and it may be a long one. And this week is normally filled with reflection and sadness. And although having children has given me a new perspective on loss, there is a warmth in my heart. I'll call it joy. The kind that sticks through the long wintr and allows me to find beauty in brown grass and bare trees and... Grief. I've always found God to be the nearest during troubling times and somehow this year, this season is a reminder of that. The God of Novembers.

I don't know

Matt started this blog a few years ago around the time that Stella was born, and I'd say for the most part, this has been about her. I keep up with this better than her baby book as far as milestones and little blurps about parenting and kind of learning as I go. I wish I had more of a purpose for writing, but by the end of the day (or in the middle) the chaos has put my mind in a temporary numbness and for the first season in my life (which I admit is not very long) I don't feel like writing. Now I've thrown Wyatt into the mix as well as some fun pictures with amateur photography skills and when it comes down to it... it is what it is.

I don't really like watching TV and I know that I could probably live without it forever, but it seems that's how I've been spending my evenings lately. Maybe I'll try writing more instead. I'm not making any promises, though. But tonight, I'm writing. And I'm going to start with rambling. Setting the bar low.

One of my favorite ways to spend my days lately is crossing off items on my to-do list. Productivity. This weekend was full of it and I didn't even need to nag Matt for anything. We were good at the whole teamwork thing this weekend. We did super-important tasks like turning the doorknob around on Stella's door so that we can lock it from the outside. No more cleaning up lunchtime's mess, thinking my girl is in her happy (quiet) place and then hearing pitter patter down the stairs, "I tumming, Momma!" No more being in fear that she will somehow make her way outside at night. Since we've lost our cat, I've become pretty nutty and overprotective.

Other tasks crossed off this weekend:
-Cleaning out the Sauna room
-Taking out the garbage
- Donating clothes
- Grocery shopping
-Returning items to various owners
-Making Pastrami omlets
-Visiting the puppies at Petco (and falling in love with a shepherd/pitbull mix named Georgia)
-Buying diapers
-Getting my bangs trimmed
-Buying Christmas outfits for the kids (Thanks Gap 40% sale!)
-Having a bar date. (Involving having a beer and onion rings at Axels- Thank you Dave and Tessa!)
-Moving and burning wood from the tree Matt cut down a few months ago
-Problem solving on Nana's eliptical machine
-Dreaming about snakes trying to get into our house

I'm feeling like I've gotten a part of myself back. I'm going to attribute that to my children and their amazing decision to bring sleep back into their lives. Wyatt is doing 5 and 3 hour stretches at night. Stella napped the past two days. If she naps tomorrow, my life could very well be turning around.

I'll leave you with a picture of Wy's new favorite past time:

3 months

Hansome boy,
It's fun to see your personality start to shine through those big eyes. I'm in love with your adoring smile and your flirty smirk. Your giggles are starting to leak out. I love you, baby boy. I love that you want to be with me all the time. I love sneaking you into bed in the early morning. I love the smell of your hair. So glad you're mine.

Stella funnies

"alligators in 'ner momma?" (while I'm brushing my teeth)

Me: "Stella, did you know that Nana is daddy's momma?"
Stella: "and Nons?"

Stella "nother olibb?"
Me: "you may have another olive after you eat more of your broccoli"
Stella: "no!! I want olibb! Pweeeease!"
Me: "sorry no olives until you eat more broccoli"
Stella "fine" (starts waiting broccoli)